Wednesday, May 31, 2006

Body Worlds (follow up)

I went.

I saw.

I walked around with my hand over my mouth in complete awed wonder.

Note to people thinking about going to this:
Do NOT wear high heels.

Yowch.

And this is old news, but ooooh. my... gawsh!

Moving on...

Try packing yourself into this exhibit with about 400+ people all at once.
I'm actually really glad I went alone, because I could weave in and out of each display fairly quicky and easily.

It doesn't really register when you're looking at the complete forms that this was once a living being. It's such a science project, and with the skin completely removed (i know... it sounds sick!), it looks more like some science construction.

Or, as it were... think back to 9th grade Biology when you discected a frog.

If you can handle that... you can definately handle this.

They had individual organs (contained in a glass case -- liver, pancreas), blood vessels (sealed in position in water-logged, glass containers) and entire body constructs that were completely touchable.

Each posed body showed off different things... a skateboarder, dancer, yoga... some guy stretching (fully relaxed) in the morning.... body splices (seperated into 8+ parts), and more body splices (of the entier system... blood and all... that I thot was behind a case, but was hanging freely just in front of me. oish!)

It’s so surreal that you don’t get scared, but on a few body splices (one in particular of a man seperated into about 10 parts), the doctors/creators left the skin on two of the pieces, so you could see what the man looked like before he was donated for plastination.

Exhibits where the hair and eyelashes were still intact were strange, but
The only really disturbing thing was when the skin/face/hair was left on the body... because then the exhibit's main foundation became reality... and you realized that this used to be a living, breathing, human being.

Hidden off toward the end was a woman who died at five months pregnant. Her kidney was removed to show the fetus still inside of her… when you went around to her back side, you could see her blackened lung (Odd how you can develop anger to someone that is no longer alive for having such disregard for a teeny little thing...but maybe she was a smoker before she had the baby and quit during pregnancy…there was no summary of how she passed).

In this area, there was also glass jars and wires displaying fetuses from 4 weeks all the way to 29 weeks. I would really like the imput of someone who is pro-abortion and has seen this display, because it's pretty apparent that this could easily change a persons stand on the issue...


Probably the most impressive was a display called "Body Exploded."
Just as in art, it is all in the presentation/placement -- and this particular one screamed creativity.

Imagine a grill plate with... jeez.... probably 2000+ (no exageration) different strings hung from the highly placed piece of steel.

Sort of puppet like... Except here, we have each organ/muscle/bone hanging individually from each string.

This display was "Exploded" in that each piece of this human body was placed in it's appropriate place, but spread out massively (so a body that only took up 5'9", 150 lbs stretched into a 15 ft x 6 ft box).



Amazing.

I was so taken back by how this had to have been put together... hung so carefully... it had to have been on par with the worlds most impossible puzzle.

If you have a weekend free sometime before the end of july - go see it. IF not, travel somewhere to see it... if still not... then go to Body Worlds three... Hopefully, they'll have some more 'lecture' style displays...

There was a guy at the end who was instructing me on the plastination proccess, as well as another teaching me about pace makers.

I felt way more involved... and learned a lot more... but maybe that's just my own personal learning style... I'd love if they had more of that in the exhibit :-)

Here are some more photos :




Smokers lungs vs. Healthy Lungs (STOP F'ING SMOKING PEOPLE!)


The nervous system

this is a 20-week old fetus.

Didn't want to offend anyone that may be sensitive - so if you want to look -go for it.

Tuesday, May 30, 2006

How many miles does it take?!

I've gone back and forth from Denver more times in my lifetime than i'll ever like to count. And all of you that have done this trip know there are about a million different routes in the middle.
I change it up inevitably each trip based on my mood... but usually end up with my gut instinct on:

a. which ruote is shortest in milage
b. which route will allow me to speed and avoid cops :-)

Last year, someone presented me with "The Guernsey Shortcut" -- Supposedly it shaves 15 - 20 minutes off of your 6 hour trip - which doesn't make sense to me at all... because while the route is more scenic and 'cuts across' the L that goes from Mule Creek Junction to Lusk from I-25 (this exit is only about 20 miles past the exit to Guernsey - the "shortcut" is 40 miles, and still takes about 25 miles to get over to Guernsey from the interstate... what?!)

I always thot it seemed fishy - and didn't really buy it...

And now that I've got a streets and maps trip planner here -- I wanted to give all of you who have some desire to know this the skinny --

Here's the Run-Down (and all of you have told me about this are sadly mistaken, and wasting driving time *and gas money*) :

Rapid -> Lusk -> Mule Creek -> Denver:
Distance: 406.7 miles Trip duration: 6 hours, 27 minutes

Rapid -> Lusk -> Guernsey "Shortcut" -> Denver:
Driving distance: 415.2 miles Trip duration: 6 hours, 49 minutes

Rapid ->Lusk -> Torrington -> Denver:
Driving distance: 388.0 miles Trip duration: 6 hours, 39 minutes

Rapid -> Newcastle, Lusk - Mule Creek -> Denver:
Driving distance: 420.1 miles Trip duration: 6 hours, 47 minutes

Rapid -> Newcastle -> Lusk -> Torrington ->Denver:
Driving distance: 401.4 miles Trip duration: 6 hours, 58 minutes

Rapid -> Scottsbluff, NE --> Denver:
Driving distance: 402.5 miles Trip duration: 6 hours, 42 minutes



Hmm... Wierd. Going through Guernsey is your worst possible bet. Sucks for all of you!
Fly through Hot springs and Torrington.. Suck up slowing down in the small cities... It said the duration of the trip is longer, but because it's on country roads, you can speed a little bit, cut 20 miles, and make it to D-Town anywhere between 5 hours - 5 hours and fifteen minutes.

PEACHY, eh!?

Eh!


**Ad0n** --- If anyone is taking any summer road trips and wants help planning their shortest carride, lemmieknow!

hooray for boobies

everytime i go to denver, i get too wrapped up in current events to have the self-dicipline to leave at a reasonable hour, leaving me enough time when I get home to unpack, clean, and settle on in with a good night's rest.

everytime i do this.

and everytime i come home, i dread pulling into my driveway at 3am or later... only to wake up at 7:30am with no voice, no sunshinee attitude, and no willingness to straighten up my home, clean up cat puke or mop/vacuum, clean the damn cat box.



i know i'm just grouchy and need some rest... but it's easier for me to rest when everything is in it's place and clean, and set up the way I like it.

So rather than go home and crash immediately tonight, I"m probably going to be completely absurd and go on a cleaning binge... finishing around 8 --- oh! enough time to go visit my favorite little chubby buddy, friends and take a little ride on my scooty boot.

then still go to bed too late.

i guess it's time i hire a house boy.
i.e. he needs to clean, wash my sheets, clean up animal shit, do my dishes, fold my clothes, place them in color order in my closet... make my bed, wash my floors, kitchen...etc.

oh yeah. i think i need to repaint my kitchen.
i had someone tea stain it and i'm... not a fan. it looks like someone just put dirt all over the walls.

so while i appreciate the suggestion... i don't appreciate how it looks.
i'm thinking of perhaps going sagee green.
$U#)$(*@)#(*#@(#!#*$@#(#.

yeah.
i said it.

Friday, May 26, 2006

oi

rouuuuuuuuugh day at work yesterday.

and something that would probably be more interesting to read about than anything else i could write right now, but out of respect, i'll only say...

quiet today.
everyone's sad.
hardest place i've ever worked... but with toughness comes greatness...right?

Most importantly, everyone has those people that you meet and instantly love. Outside of my family, I don't have very many of them.

It's not the "i want to do you" or "i can't live without you..." kind of love - just the "genuine, no question whatsoever, because your head, heart and gut all say that this is a good person and you'd be absolutely moronic not to have them in your life" love, no matter what the duration or circumstance of who/what they are.

My entire being goes into "i would jump in front of a damn bus for you!" mode because just their prescence makes me feel considerably brighter.

i just found out this morning that one of my most favorite people that represents the very definition of the above, is being moved back over to where he used to until he can come back to this company (in awhile... i'm hoping sooner than later).

SAD!
so glad he still has his job - but i'm very sad to not be able to see him every day ;-(

anyway -
i'm going to denver for the weekend. yahoo!!
lots of sleeping... movies... laying around... and, well... you know!

:-)

i think my step dad is putting sirius radio in my car today so I have somethin to listen to. hachacha. He's the best guy.

I'm continually reminded of how great he is every day --- and how funny.

Today I drove by a suburban.

The ONLY suburban I've ever seen that has been decked to the nines in zebra stripes.
It belongs to a car place on 5th street that rents the vehicle out ever so often...

and when I saw it, I was reminded that on their Wedding my Step Dad had rented it out for his Wedding day - so the girls could have the pimp limo, and He, my brother Jake and his son Brandon could tux around in the sweet suburban.

Toooooo funny.

I only hope I get so lucky as my mom did.
though, she's pretty hot shit... so if i were my step dad, i would probably be that awesome to stay in her graces.

Thursday, May 25, 2006

oh, what a debacle

I was just sitting here wondering which of two things I should ingest:

1. a bag of hot tomales that i bought yesterday and left in my car overnight...
2. all of my daily vitamins.



Now this is a lot, considering vitamin intake:
a multi -2
milk thistle -2
ginseng -2
bc -1
flaxseed oil -2
some supplement i have to take for my adrenal glands -2

plus there's the shot of aloe vera in the morning, and the ibuprofin (2) i've had to taken because of some disc out in my back that is giving me a raging headache...

So you have 2, 4, 6, 7, 9, 11, 13 pills + some gooey shit (which is actually really awesome).

I figured I"d go for the good-for-you drugs, rather than the little red cinnamon -coated sugar that is "ooooooh-so-good" variety (although i'll probably snack on those this afternoon).

unfortunately, for all of you other pill poppers out there, you're well aware that stuff like this makes you pretty sick to your stomach... even if you're taking them all on a stomach full of food.

blickity-blickenstein.

I should have been born with red Hair.

I am:
a huge flirt
a terrible karoke singer
extremely loud
sexual blundt
very outspoken
a firey, snotty little brat.

i got pulled over tonight by a cop because i didn't have liscence ('m never going to know how to spell that damn word) plates on my scooter.

"It's 49cc. you don't need them"

"Well what are you going to do if you crash into my $40,000 truck?!"

"Pay for it with money..."

"I'm going to SUE YOU! So you need to be quiet because i'm just trying to help you."

"I'm listening. I just did all my research, and i KNOW that you don't need a license. It just needs to be registered and it is!"

I stood with my hands on my hips for about 10 minutes, then climbed back no my scooter and rested my chin in my left hand, acting like my time was being extremely wasted (it was).

I was asked back into the car and given a 'warning' that basically said nothing except for "please make sure you call to have this insured."

ok. no one told me i had to do that. do you really think if i barrell into someone's "$40,000" truck with my scooter, it's going to be because of me?!

Um no, it's probably because you weren't paying attention and knocked me off my teeny, tiny little scooter... and then who will be sueing who?

No one. because i don't believe in sueing. But your ass better bring me a wholes' lotta damn FLOWERS WHEN I"M IN THE HOSPITAL!!!!!

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

I know most of you will understand...

Best of Craigslist rocks.
John and i have made it habitual to jet on over once in awhile to waste an hour or two.

I stumbled upon the following and decided this guy would be one of my closest companions, if ever I chose to live in Washington D.C (which is pretty unlikely)...

--------------------------

“So, what do you do?”

Sweet Jesus, I hate this question; it infests DC like no other place I’ve lived. I get asked it every time I meet people, be they at or bar, friends of friends, spontaneous conversations in Safeway—hell, ragged old ladies sometimes accost me walking down the street, just to find out what I do.

My job lacks the excitement or concise definition of most vocations, so I normally just lie about it.

“So, what do you do?” the homeless guy outside the Rosslyn Metro asks me.

“Why…I…am…Assistant…Director…of…Resource…Management…of…Poultry,” I reply.

“Wait a second—why did you pause so much? Are you just making this up?” the homeless guy menacingly intones.

“Of…course…not…I…was…just…building…suspense,” I say, before throwing down my Vitamin Water and bagel and running away in shame.

The fact of the matter is, I’m very unsure of what my job actually IS.

I work at an office and do a little bit of this (Solitaire) and a little bit of that (Spider Solitaire), but nothing that can be encapsulated in one or two words, like “Fireman” or “Bikini Inspector”. For me, everyday is an aggregate of small, insignificant tasks, designed solely for the purpose of making it to 5 PM.

Play a game of Solitaire, 10 minutes.
Knock out a Sudoku, 10 more minutes.
Brew and drink coffee—oh, I can stretch that for at least a quarter hour.

Trouble is, by 11 AM each day I’m normally wired on caffeine and exhausted of brief computer games, so I’m always desperately in need of Big Timekilling Activities.

I’ve developed elaborate BTA’s involving round robin tournaments of office games, games that normally include Styrofoam cups, uneaten yogurt tins, and a three-hole punch, but those normally end quickly in tragedy:

“Good God, this coffee tastes terrible! And what’s this gooey purple stuff on my papers?” my boss inevitably asks. I tend to look away and make a cryptic comment about the last intern being “Very, very strange. And possibly retarded.”

So as you can see, the collective nincompoopery of my officemates puts the kibosh on office game BTA’s, so I have to turn to tasks more individual in nature.

The other day, for instance, I decided that there was no good reason not to make a paper clip necklace.

I took the precaution of borrowing the receptionist’s paper clips, because there was no way in hell those puppies were going to survive, and I didn’t want to be accused of wasting office supplies. I finished in about 10 minutes, put on the necklace and snuck into the restroom to check myself out.

“Hmm, good, but not that good,” I said aloud, admiring my handiwork in the bathroom mirror. “I really can make it bigger.”

“It’s not the size of the boat, just the motion in the ocean,” the middle-aged man from across the hall said as he exited the bathroom stall.

“You’ll be fine, son.”

“No, I wasn’t talking about that, I was talking about…” I began, before realizing that I had two options here: admit that I was just looking at a paper clip necklace I made for myself, or fess up to a complete stranger about feelings of penile inadequacy. Tough call, but the choice was clear.

“Thanks, I’m sure women will like me just the way I am,” I answered with a nod. I think I made the right decision—because in the end, I had a whole day in front of me, a cup full of paper clips, and, by God, I was GOING to make it bigger.

Follow the Bouncing Ball...

i put a band-aid on my finger
because i just sliced it open while cutting an avacado.
the band aid is too tight.
thus, my finger is purple.

but my whole point is...

guacamole is awesome.
i am without chips.
so bring some over.
so we can eat the entire bowl!

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

Just Left of Bad Luck

Things have actually been going very swimmingly as of late, but it seems that the left side of my body is taking all the major hits.

I could feel a sore throat coming on (which feels wierd after you have your tonsils removed) and a raging middle ear infection.

What did James call it? Otomediapathy? Haha. I don't remember.

As if that didn't hurt enough, I was riding to work this morning on my scooter and in my 35 mph scooter path, that damn bee flew his damn stinger right into the nape of my neck, nestling right on in the collar of my jacket and sitting there until i scooped him out.

I'm sitting at work now with a giant ice pack on the red, swollen sting just now realizing that there is satisfaction in what just happened - because don't bees die as soon as they sting someone.

Yeah, bitch. Take it all!

If anyone knows of any ani-stick-stuff-in-you-ear remedies for the very above problem, I would appreciate it. It's throwing off my balance and stuff... i hate ears...


On another note, to save you the hassle... The post office does NOT meter more than five pieces of mail at a time (Lame, I know!).

So, instead of just dropping 300+ envelopes I had spent ALL day compiling yesterday into a metering machine, I had to individually stamp every single one (are you kidding me!?)

Canada's were annoying, because I had to put a combo on (one 84 cent stamp, two 3 cents stamps)... but the kicker is when I had gotten halfway through the United States Mailers when another postal worker said,

"Oh... you'll need more than that on there!"
"No... she said she sold me 63 cent stamps..."
"No, those are only 39."

"Great...," I started to get annoyed. "So, is she going to help me restamp all of these then, cause this is taking for ever?"

Nope. I got a little help toward the end, but after I had to pay an additional $64 dollars (of my own cash) to get a second stamp to place on the 300 envelopes, I was pretty f'ing peeved.

Postal Service** and I... not getting along right now...

**government ran business... not the band.

Friday, May 19, 2006

Tan Hands

Burnt Neck, Chest, Nose, Head, Forearms...

That's what scooter ridin' will do to you.

I bought this shirt at Buffalo Exchange about a month ago. I love it. The color. The hoody.. I wear it quite often, but i think it may be a little bit of a preggo shirt... which could give people entirely the wrong impression.

OH's well.

Despite the color of this dress, i really dig this outfit, and want to get some sort of sheerish summer dress like this and new espadrills (i have ones just like this, but they're totally shot from the past year...) sometime this weekend:



I just need to get my legs back up to snuff.

It's getting so hot here (91 yesterday) and since my house doesn't have air conditioning (yet), i had to put the cooler directly on me while sleeping. Mix that with crisp white sheets and you've got a night of fabulous rest.

Today is great because:
A. it's beautiful outside
B. it is a photoshoot day, in which I ride my scoot over to my parents, then go take pictures all day with richard
C. it is friday

And even tho i'm having trememdous problems with my neck and shoulders as of late (i have no idea why...? must be an allergy...) life is good.

The Davinci Code comes out this weekend. I thot it wasn't due out to fall, so sa-weet.
Funny... i bought the book over two years ago and still haven't read it...


So all you 9-5ers... have fun sitting at your desk all day. i'm going outside to play! owwww! :-)

Thursday, May 18, 2006

Gosh, this is so cool!

Everytime I'm in Denver, I want to go to this exhibit, and every time I am there, I don't go!

But I am going to go next weekend... Because I know I will kick my ass if I don't.
Plus, how cool would it be to see the innerworkings of things to make smarter decisions regaurding health/nutrition?

I love science. LOVE It.
If anyone is in Denver next Saturday (the 27th) and would like to go with me, please let me know!
$22 during the day
$17 at night (i vote for nighttime :-))

Otherwise, i'm flyin' solo.

I also want to go to the Botanical Gardens. Lived there two years and never went. Lame!

Here's some info:

Gunther Von Hagens' BODY WORLDS 2:
The Anatomical Exhibition of Real Human Bodies

at the Denver Museum of Nature & Science
2001 Colorado Blvd., Denver, CO
Now through July 23 only!
Purchase tickets online or call 303.322.7009.

Uncover the incredible beauty and complexities beneath your skin when the most popular touring exhibition in the world, Gunther von Hagens' BODY WORLDS 2: The Anatomical Exhibition of Real Human Bodies, comes to the Denver Museum of Nature & Science from March 10–July 23, 2006.

Created by Dr. Gunther von Hagens, a licensed physician and anesthesiologist, BODY WORLDS and BODY WORLDS 2 have drawn more than 18 million viewers worldwide. Visitors to the exhibition learn about anatomy, physiology and, most importantly, the influence of lifestyle choices, like diet and exercise, on personal health—all by viewing real human bodies permanently preserved through an innovative method called Plastination. The exhibition is presented in Denver by Centura Health, Colorado's largest family of not-for-profit hospitals and health services.

"BODY WORLDS 2 is a compelling, memorable experience that will give all who view it a new perspective on the inner workings of the human body and the importance of healthy lifestyle choices," said Dr. Bridget Coughlin, curator of human health at the Denver Museum of Nature & Science. "The exhibition features more than 200 real human specimens. These specimens give visitors access to a deeper understanding of disease and pathology formerly only available to surgeons. Through examples such as arthritis in the aging process, the effects of tobacco consumption and the complexity of the nervous system, the exhibition has given me an incredible respect for what it means to be human."

The plastination process was invented by von Hagens at the University of Heidelberg in 1977. The process replaces the natural fluids in the body with reactive fluid plastics that harden after vacuum-forced impregnation. Plastination provides the flexibility and strength needed to display and preserve specimens in realistic forms, without the use of glass barriers and formaldehyde. Von Hagens founded the Institute for Plastination in 1993, in order to offer plastinated specimens for educational use and for the BODY WORLDS exhibitions. All anatomical specimens on display in the BODY WORLDS exhibitions are authentic. The bodies were donated for plastination purposes through a declaration of will directly from the individuals involved.

"BODY WORLDS allows people from all backgrounds to better understand the body and how it functions," said von Hagens. "As event anatomy, BODY WORLDS juxtaposes healthy and diseased organs and features whole body specimens in dynamic lifelike poses. Plastinated anatomy is beauty beneath the skin, frozen in time between death and decay. It opens the heart to our inner self and makes us fall in love with our own body."

The Museum will offer special evening hours during the run of the show to meet popular demand.

Purchase tickets online or call 303.322.7009.


(Source)

Wednesday, May 17, 2006

How Depressing...

Uhh...

So I don't own a scale.


I've never owned a scale.
But my mom does, and since I was doing a photoshoot with Rich over at their house (because Veda has the coolest dog kennel ever), I did stop in to weigh myself and was appauled when the number creeped up just 10lbs short of what I used to weigh my Freshman year of High School.

Trust me, that wasn't my fittest time.

So... as I rode back to work on my scooter, tears flying from my face in the wind, I slipped on the most disiplined, motivated hat of all time - because luckily, when I get depressed, I don't reach for a big piece of cake... I just get really pissed off.

I'm pretty much fed up with having fat cow disease.
The fat bus stops right HERE.

So if you want to offer any encouragement (not empty reassurances, because i'm really not fishing, i'm just being blatantly honest... ), make sure I don't give up on the committment in a week or so and send me some "keep your ass moving!" love right here.

Thanks. I appreciate it.


Love,

The "currently" Big Fat Cow.
Big Fat Cow

p.s. mooo.

Tuesday, May 16, 2006

Give me my Life Back!

Man...

So, When I first moved to denver a few years ago, I had the opportunity to be an intern for $100 a week at Mania TV...

Seriously, cool thing. If you haven't heard of them, they're kind of a big deal.

When I walked into the interview, I was super charmed by the huge school bus housing all of the technical equipment and the open warehouse. Looked like fun.

The guy in charge of marketing was even cooler. Italian guy, who was looking to get married soon (this only came up because I was writing for a Destination Wedding Planning Company).

The sad thing is, that straightening out the internship/really-part time job set-up took for-ever.
We e-mailed each other... back and forth, back and forth.

I was really excited to go work there, but he just never knew for sure what his answer was.

Along the way, I went to interview with Ma, Scott and Johnny Burr over at Soundstructure and The Walnut Room.

Fell in love. Wanted the job. GOT the job!

Just a day later, the guy from Mania TV contacted me with a solidified position for intern at Mania TV for the proposed $100 a week, as long as I put in 15-20 hours or so a week.

My first thot was... Man! Working 60 hours a week would blow... and I bet it's kind of a commute. I'll never have time to... do nothing.

Seriously... what would I have done? I had no friends... no boyfriend... nothing but free time to watch movies, eat fruit pizza and go running on green mountain.

Now i'm bummed because I should have just sacrificed that time...really, it's the great way to have my Vh1/MTV Lifestyle without having to live in New York. Not to mention the fact that ManiaTV is actually located only a FEW BLOCKS from SS/TWR. Crazy...

I probably would have made friends FROM Mania... while making all the friends I did at Soundstructure/TWR and when Soundstructure went part time, I probably could have picked up a zillion more hours or a full-time commitment over at Mania doing what i really really really love (working hard in an environment I thrive in - music... music...glamour television...music)... and i'd pretty much feel like the coolest person ever.

I also probably wouldn't be in South Dakota Right now.

Grrrrrrr.

Damn that all!!!!!!!! Damn that!!

I really need to get "my shit" back on track...

Thursday, May 11, 2006

That's just too bad for her...

Looks like Teri Hatcher is slowly turning into janice dickenson.



Gross.

Wednesday, May 10, 2006

It's a Different World

Here, I have One World, because my friends are my family, my family is everywhere, and my job is partially revolved around family. It's a giant connective circle.

Compare that to Denver, and the circumstances are much different, Because -

In Denver, I had Three Worlds:

1. My Job
2. My Friends
3. My Boyfriend.

They all started out as one, then split apart last fall due to certain situations that pretty much everyone . Friends are always good, I was too far into the relationship to give it up, and my job... well... my boss like a big brother that I'd never want to disapoint. I dealt with them how I wanted, and now I am where I am because of this.

Mind you... (World 3) the boy's birthday falls on a Sunday this year... Just one day after he plays a show:

(World 1)*:at the venue I used to work
(World 2)*:on the same bill with a few of my friends...

On June 24th, all three worlds collide again, which hasn't happened since hmm... never, and I am faced with the uncomfortable dilema of being pretty much obligated to be at said event because it rolls right into... that's right --- Seanzie's birthday.

Crap.

You see... in Denver I was able to avoid these catastrophe's all together...

But now, when it's an event for me to drive down for a weekend, it is not so. Call this 'shady' or whatever you will, but i was in the middle of a tug of war so long (because I want to be accomodating to everyone rather than do what i want for myself) that I'm used to that spot, and used to scheduling/co-operating with this lifestyle norm...

So... rather than be all, "Who cares what the f' you think about me!!?!" I care a lot, because people's opinions and feelings toward me are very important. Call that insecure, but... that's just who I am...

Add this on top of the fact that I haven't gotten an ounce of sleep for the last 3 days for god knows why, and I'm pretty sure I'll be up even longer worrying about this pre-determined debacle one month for next wednesday. Because how am I supposed to be there, and still have everyone happy with me?

Not...going....to happen *sigh* :0-(

This weighs heavy on my heart...

*I'm completely aware that if they all don't mesh, it probably shouldn't be done... but, sorry! i don't work that way. ask anyone.

Monday, May 08, 2006

Interesting

I was talking about this with my mom over lunch today...

I thought it was semi-interesting:

Remote S. Dakota is new home for FLDS
Author says:
'The lengths they've gone to to keep it secret are extraordinary'

A third outpost created by followers of fugitive polygamist leader Warren Jeffs has been discovered in the Black Hills of South Dakota.

The 100-acre, wooded property, near Pringle, S.D., features residential buildings, a large steel warehouse and outbuildings. The land was bought in October 2003 by David Steed Allred, about the same time he purchased a 1,371-acre ranch in Eldorado, Texas.
The South Dakota site appears to be on par with an FLDS development in Mancos, Colo., said author Jon Krakauer, who has visited the area twice to document the new holding. A building permit lists costs of materials at $450,000, but nothing for labor.

"By the amount of money being put into it, it is an important property," Krakauer said. "The lengths they've gone to to keep it secret are extraordinary."

Krakauer said authorities in Mohave County, Ariz. - where Jeffs is wanted on criminal charges - received an anonymous tip about the development last summer but had too little information to trace the property.

In January, the same caller contacted The Eldorado Success, a weekly newspaper in

Texas, which relayed the tip to Krakauer and private investigator Sam Brower. The paper posted a story on its Web site Wednesday.

Krakauer, author of Under The Banner of Heaven, now devotes his efforts to tracking Jeffs' activities. The 50-year-old Jeffs, head of the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, is wanted by the FBI on an Arizona charge of arranging an underage marriage.
Krakauer found that Allred had paid $135,000 for the South Dakota land, then transferred it to a now-defunct Utah company headed by Jerald N. Williams.

"We knew right away that it was Warren's people," Krakauer said.

Both Allred and Williams are top advisers for Jeffs, according to Krakauer and former FLDS member Marvin Wyler of Colorado City, Ariz.

Williams "was very high up in the system of things," Wyler said, and until a year ago oversaw work projects in FLDS enclave of Colorado City and Hildale, Utah. Williams since has moved.

The twin towns are home to the FLDS church, which also counts members in Bountiful, British Columbia and Nevada. It hews to early teachings of Joseph Smith, founder of the Mormon church, including plural marriage.

The Salt Lake City-based Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints discontinued the practice of polygamy in 1890.

Allred apparently told people in South Dakota he planned to use the property for a "corporate retreat" - the same description he gave when buying the Texas and Colorado properties.
Ken Hubbart, then a county inspector, said his office was told the owners planned to build a two-story dormitory-style lodge, a large stable and a caretaker's cabin. Hubbart said the property only had access roads on it at the time.

Construction has proceeded around the clock, much to the annoyance of some neighbors.

"You can hear equipment running all the time," said Cheryl Hadlock, who lives east of the FLDS property. "They're digging constantly. And that's getting us kind of worried. We don't know what they're digging, why they're digging."

But Hadlock said the new neighbors have otherwise left them alone. "They've been good to us. We haven't had any problems with them. It just makes you wonder what they're doing."

A building permit issued for a three-story, 7,200-square-foot residential building on the property's west side lists seven bedrooms and 10 bathrooms, though Krakauer said others who have been in the building counted as many 21 bedrooms. There also is a well house nearby.

On the east side of the property, there is a second three-story log residence and a detached garage. The permit lists the dwelling as having three bedrooms and seven bathrooms, though it, too, has more rooms, Krakauer said.

A 12,350-square-foot steel building identified as a horse stable likely includes numerous bedrooms and offices. The property has three water wells, grain silos, an irrigated orchard and a large garden.

Like the properties in Texas and Colorado, the South Dakota development is "in the middle of nowhere," Brower, the private investigator, said. "It has been completely under the radar for a long time."

The property is 15 miles southwest of Pringle, a tiny town that consists of little more than a post office and a bar.

It's about 22 miles from the county seat of Custer, named after Gen. George A. Custer. Located in the southwest corner of South Dakota, the area is home to national forests, parks and monuments. Just north of Custer, a giant mountain carving of Crazy Horse is under way.

"Warren has good taste in real estate," Krakauer said. "They are beautiful places."

Krakauer and Brower believe the new development was designed to be a hideout for Jeffs.

Jeffs has other places of lesser significance, "but none like this," said Krakauer, who estimates up to 80 men, women and children were at the South Dakota property when he was there in January.

Custer County Sheriff Phil Hespen said he was aware the FLDS owned property there and declined to comment about any FBI activity in the area.

"If we knew he [Warren Jeffs] was there, we would have scooped him up a long time ago," he said.

FBI Special Agent Deborah McCarley in Phoenix said the agency is aware of the FLDS property in South Dakota. She said the agency follows up on all tips concerning Jeffs' whereabouts.
The search continues, she said, but "any leads that suggest we're close to him, no."

**:Apparently the Church of Latter Day Saints went off their own direction from The mormon faith and still practice the "old School" customs of the religion... i.e. Polygamy, marrying 13-year-old children, and so on...

Reflecting...

I've been thinking that the first time a significant other says "i Love you," it's a pretty damn big deal.

I remember the first time anyone non-related with a penis had ever said it to me --- and nearly a year later, how it has become such a common uttering between us.

On a drive home up to my Lakewood Apartment, we were blaring DMB in my car and he got all serious.

"I have something I want to say, but I'm kind of scared to say it, because it's so soon."

"Please don't say it then...," I quickly replied.
Not because I didn't adore him back, but because it had only been five weeks or so, and commitment scared the bajebus out of me.

About a week or two later, we were packing up all of my stuff so that I'd be ready to move into my new apartment in the Highlands.

He had brought up this guy that had come to visit just a week prior and had asked exactly what the deal was.

"Yeah," I said. "He was pretty much the love of my life."

I remember he paused, TV in arms.

Oh god. Did I just say that?

He set the T.V. down and looked at me. "So... what the hell are you doing with me? You never make sense?!" (i really don't...)

I yelled out some argumentative phrases that I knew would allow me to win the argument, then jetted off to the kitchen to angrily pack up some dishes. He followed, and began to paint my dining room as I huffed in the corner and pretended like I couldn't have been more insulted that he had just said something so rudely to me.

"Just because I said he WAS doesn't mean he still IS.. I'm with you. I want you. What the hell!?! Why would I help you out so much? Why would I do all of this for you if I didn't care about you?!?!!"

And then that three letter phrase that every normal human being longs to hear came spilling out his mouth...

"I just get so confused and you say those things about some other guy and god, I don't even want to say it but I LOVE You. I am in LOVE WITH YOU."

I just sat there quiet. Crying.

I can't believe I that came out at THAT moment.

I didn't say it back. I think I had too much pride in that moment for feeling so guilty and horrible that the words didn't come.

And I think it was so difficult because to me, it's what you do, not what you say, and every little thing I had been doing for him had screamed levels of "I love you..." and i figured he just should have known.

But then, after I slammed a few dishes into a box, let some akward silence pass, and really got the gusto to appreciate what just happened... it all just passed... and despite all the shit that's flown over the last year... he's been spending every single day of his life making sure that I know just how much he meant those words the first time he said them...

Odd isn't it? I thought moving away may change things... but it has had the opposite effect. And for those of you who think i'm crazy... then so be it... let's sit back and judge all of your past relationship bullshit. :-)

Congratulations... You're a Woman

My dog... is on her period.

Wierd, huh?

I knew they had periods, but I've never experienced having a dog that was on one.

For 21 Days?!?!?!

Good lord.
That's a long time to wear a big fatty diaper.

Tho, Her vagina is so engorged and huge right now, I've considered letting her wear a tampon.

Groooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooss.

All I can say is I'm glad she's with me instead of her dad. It's important to be around other girls...

I wonder if it's ok to let her indulge in some chocolate... or if she's having a number of 'fat days' where she gets all bloated...

Friday, May 05, 2006

My Three Big Loves

There are a few big loves in our lifetime.

And then there are the little ones that go unmentioned in day-to-day conversation:

1. The Soup Spoon. I looooovvvvvee the soup spoon. Yeah, a regular one gets the job done, but does it let you bury your upper lip deep into the concave construction? I really, really really love the soup spoon - so much so that I get a little excited when I order soup and know that one is coming my way.

I can't explain the bizarre adoration I have for this inatimate object, other than just like wrapping a warm towel around your fresh-out-of-the-shower body, the soup spoon offers my mouth that same, overwhelming comfort.





2. FeBreeze: Hi... best invention EVER. Now, I can't smell, but you can bet your ass in a home that houses me, two cats and a pup, that it's going to get stinky. I have full confidence that when I clean my house, open some windows and then Febreeze the hell out of every fabric/carpet/surface in my home, that it's going to smell like roses.

"Some genius chemistry geek over at proctor and gamble, said, 'Let's create a spray that you can spray on ANYTHING and EVERYTHING, to make it smell good'. Now we all use Febreeze to refreshen the odors on our couches, carpets, towels, clothes, mouths, armpits, car upholstry, dogs, cats, gerbils, guinea pigs... whatever still stinks you need to extinguish." (quoted)

Better this than worrying about some wierd stench floating around my house...
These people have different ideas of the best invention; but in my top 10, Febreeze rules King.








3. The Dog Park: Rapid City may not have much to offer commercial wise (no stores, no Whole Foods, 1 Starbucks, just just JUST got an Olive Garden, no... shops/restraunts open past 8!!?!?), but they do get the million dollar prize for the insanely beautiful dog park reserved for our four-legged friends just west of the Fish Hatchery.

Have a puppy driving you absolutely nuts? Need to run her out of energy? Need to socialize them around other people and dogs?
There's your answer... A huge, multi-acre lot with trees, right near the creek and complete with an old hocky rink that has been turned into a little 'training' area for your pooch to run around rampid for an hour plus.

I don't even question what I'll do after work now. It's Get off work, go home, get the dog, DRIVE to the dog park.

Now Bela expects it, is well behaved during the day because of it and is now so familiar with the route that she gets all excited on the way there.

Gotsta thank Suzy for introducing me and all the cool people there (Nolan, Kaylie and our little friends: Teddy, Odin, Isis and more...) for lettin Miss Thang be social butterfly. :-)

And I guess that Last one can go as one of Bela's Big Loves, too... right alongside treats and her duckie.

Thursday, May 04, 2006

Change is good.

Especially to buy the individual-sized of hot tomales i eat every day, or to get that 24 oz mexican mocha in the morning.

Man, it's a fun afternoon with Sami!!

And unlike the Hershey's Ad Campagne, I thing The Change in status quo is good, too.

Hell, i've never lived anywhere longer than a year since I turned 18 because I like to change up my surroundings ever-so-often.

Proof:

Freshman Year: 7th Floor South; Sechrist Hall (1 week) - over to Mtn. View (Greek Dorm) for 5 hours (with all my stuff) - back to Sechrist (which is cool, because it was in Forrest Gump)

Sophomore Year: Shitty Apartment with Shitty Roomates... 6 months - Back Home for 8 months

Junior Year: North Morton Dorm - Haunted Floor with Cool ass Bitches

Senior Year: Apartment life with Suz (best year ever)


First Year on Own: Lakewood: nice apartment...

Second Year on Own: Highlands (love it) until March 06

Now: Owning a home... probably here for 4-6 months more.

It's good because it constantly forces you to re-evaluate all of your situations - move around your stuff; clean; organize, etc.

I guess I never really liked getting "too" comfortable in anything I do anyway (don't let the house owning fool ya... it sort of 'fit' with this change i'm moving through for the year) - which could either help or hinder, depending on how you look at things.

Now, because of change, I'm in a job that could very well be perfect for me.

Aside from having a hard time with the 8-5, I get to do photo shoots (working with my stepdad, whom I spent an hour with at Lunch listening to sweet sports photog stories) then spend hours in Photoshop making stuff look better, then redesigning an entire base for a company.

oooooh. The Power!

Es Muy Fun!

I think it's also another reason why I like Myspace.

I have friends contact me that I haven't spoken with for years, and I get to check in and see how things are flowing. Not only is it a good way for me to express all of my creative outlets, but it's a good reminder for me because among all of my desire for flee and flight, I forget the way things use to be sometimes...

I wonder if that's intentional?

Or if i'm just trying too damn hard to keep up with my life path...

This post had no point. more stream of consciousness.
Kind of like...
ooooh. space heater
my house is a mess...
my dog is sopping wet in the backyard...
i can't wait to do laundry and curl up in clean sheets.
this cut on my finger from making guacamole last night is a total bitch.
i bet i'm annoying everyone with the buzzing of the space heater.
i don't really care, because my legs are warm.
the guy that just walked in is really tall. and really huge!
i wonder how tall he is?
*sigh*

nothing interesting on the brain today.
i'm not stimulating all of the time.
tho i'd like to be...
like a big, fat, battery-charged vibrator.
oooowwwww!

p.s. how many of you want some chocolate now?
yeah!

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

Hmm...

I went more blondee-blonde and got myself a little bob cut goin on:


You can't totally tell in that photo, but I thot the face was an appropriate sami expression.

Looking for something worthwhile to express to you all...

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Oh Joy!

Call me stupid, but I think Simple Life is hilarious, and you can bet your ass I watched the giant marathon of Simple Life 2 that they had on E! on Sunday.

Why a marathon?

Because Simple Life 4 hits E! this Thursday with a whole new format:

Think Wife Swap meets glamville.

I wonder where the wives go while paris/nicole is in their home?

Sneaky way to get around the whole debacle between the two (i've heard it's because paris had a big fat party to watch herself on SNL - Richie put on her infamous sex video instead...woops)...

just have them showcased in homes far, far away from each other.

I can't imagine they have much leeway in the families they choose...
and I also can't picture them holding families together.

I doubt it's going to be that great because FOX Network dropped the show, and they will usually take anything.

Looks like E! is the new Fox!!! But we really do need a trash tv network, so thank you.
Thank you E!

It's really too bad that the two princesses don't get along anymore, because part of the hilarity is how they egg each other on when they are together.

What can ya do tho...

I guess watch and find out...

Bitter Ex-Girlfriends of the World Unite



in one sembriotic act.

Uh oh boys... your reputations are screwed...

but you won't be.
ha.

Sad!

You Don't have to be rich to rule my world.

I was in the D-Note at Arvada a few weeks ago and after the show was over, the sound guy threw on the new Prince Album: 3121 and I Danced my little ass off in the doorway while I waited for my man to load up all of his gear.

Add a little spanish to a little traditional prince to a little more dance grooves and you have a pretty good album (when the mood calls).

Yesterday on my lunch break, I jetted over to Best Buy on my free time and got me some new Prince.

Upon flipping through the liner notes, I noticed two things:

1. Pictures and Photgrapy done by....
2. "Most importantly, to the all and mighty: Jehovah"

Aside from my usual tendancy to edit the misspelling (grammar/editorial freak), I started to wonder... Is Prince a Jehovah's Witness?

Now, I don't really know much about Prince, save my aunt was a pair of legs in one of his videos with Leah Thompson in the 80s (it's in this mix somewhere), and I thot that "Peach" song was really sweet.

And regarding the Witnesses, I only have rememberance of them coming to our door a million times uninvited when I was growing up -- which was odd, because we were no where near residential areas...

So I did a little research:

Prince and the Jehovah's Witnesses
Prince has had an interesting career - but many may be unaware of the fact that he has recently converted to the Jehovah's Witnesses. Even fewer are probably aware of the fact that Prince's religious beliefs have begun to filter into his music, including his older music.

Rick Ross writes:
Four years ago the funkster converted reportedly to satisfy his mother’s dying wish, but since then Prince has gone so far as to add religious lyrics to his theme song “Purple Rain.” The new line in the song goes, “Say you can’t make up your mind? I think you better close it and open up the Bible.” Close your mind? Isn’t that like being “brainwashed”?

Prince may have even recast his old battles with record companies into something religious. “I can tell you who made the System,” he told Newsweek cryptically (April 12, 2004). The “System,” according to Prince apparently includes the music recording business that he says once “enslaved” him. But the word “System” has a darker connotation than slavery amongst Jehovah’s Witnesses. It encompasses everything “worldly” outside of the organization, which includes all world governments, businesses and any other religious organizations. And "who made the System” and essentially controls it today? According to the Witnesses its creator and guiding light is Satan.

Evidently, Prince proselytizes door- to-door just like other Witnesses - but unlike other Witnesses, he participates in the "System" in ways that would normally be shunned. When he does proselytize, according to Ross, he goes in a limo with four bodyguards and tailor-made suits. Pity that all Witnesses aren't given the same latitude - but they can't contribute millions to the cause like Prince can. You don't suppose that has anything to do with it, do you?
(taken from this site).


Apparently, he even fought the state of massachusettes on the matter.

But what exactly IS a Jehova's Witness???
A Christian group originating in the United States at the end of the 19th cent., organized by Charles Taze Russell Russell, Charles Taze, 1852–1916, founder of the movement whose followers are known as Russellites, as Bible Students, and (since 1931) as Jehovah's Witnesses , b. Pittsburgh, Pa.

There, he predicted (1872) the second coming of Christ and the millennium. In 1878 he organized his followers as an independent church, whose doctrine centers on the Second Coming of Christ.

The Witnesses believe that the event has already commenced; they also believe the battle of Armageddon is imminent and that it will be followed by a millennial period when repentant sinners will have a second chance for salvation.

The Witnesses base their teaching on the Bible. They have no churches but meet in buildings that are always named Kingdom Hall. There are no official ministers because all Jehovah's Witnesses are considered ministers of the gospel.

Their views are circulated in The Watchtower, Awake!, and other publications and by house-to-house canvasing carried on by members. Since their beginning, the Witnesses have been the subject of harassment virtually everywhere that they have been active. Regarding governments as the work of Satan, the Witnesses refuse to bear arms in war or participate in the affairs of government.

Their refusal to salute the flag brought about a controversy that resulted in a decision in their favor by the U.S. Supreme Court in 1943. The Witnesses insist upon a rigid moral code and refuse blood transfusions.

Before 1931, Jehovah's Witnesses were called Russellites; abroad the movement is usually known as the International Bible Students Association. Active in almost every country in the world, the group has more than 1 million members in the United States.

Other famous Witnesses:
Ida. E. Eisenhower (Dwight's mama)
Katharine Jackson (Michael, Janet, Latoya's mom)
Michelle Rodriguez (hot girl actress)
Lark Voorhies (Lisa Turtle, SBTB)

Who used to be in?
Geri Halliwell (Ginger Spice of the Spice Girls)
Ja Rule
The Wayans Brothers
(interesting...)
Naomi Campbell (Think maybe she should have held onto her religious routes, as she's been out around town, bitch slapping everyone and their brother)
Michael Jackson (Same goes for the white-gloved wonder, but for very different, obvious reasons...)

How is this affecting Prince's way of life?
*Well, a much-needed hip surgery wont' be happening, due to dispbelief in, well... surgery.
*his album presentation.
*Singing some of his old-school tunes... not happening!
Some lying around time as, he is traveling door to door like most traditional followers (as previously mentioned).

How would you feel if the teeny, tiny 5'3" Minneapolin (word? ha) showed up on your door pushin' his new (seemingly since 2001 or so...) religion on you?

All of this aside, I'm still wondering if he's just Prince, the Artist formerlly known as prince, or that symbol showcased above his bed on the new album.

I wonder if he knows that to make your self a god-like figure is horribly against the religion?
Of course, that may just be Catholocism...

What a confusing character...

Monday, May 01, 2006

Sign me Up.

I finally met my neighbors.

Something I've been avoiding because I'm a pretty private person when it comes to my home. My home's my sanctuary and I don't really want total strangers involved in what I do on a daily basis.

Plus, I knew they were older/retired and looking to fix me up with a bunch of the neighbor boys (i'm taken, thank you) when they solicited my mom for information one day when she was outside.

"Hurry Sami. Don't Look. Just get. In. The Car. Go..."

She wasn't wrong...
They are of the "grade A, run-of-the-mill Gladys Kravitz" species.

I came home from work on Friday, blaring Kelly Clarkson and intending to do a quick clothes change, then load Bela into the car to go to the dog park.

One track mind: Dog Park. Dog Park. Dog Park. Dog Park.

"Your dog got tangled up."

What...? Where did that come from?

I look up and my next door neighbor is leaning up against his fence.

"Ooooh... Hi. Have you been the sneaky guy snowblowing my sidewalks and bringing my trash in?"

"Oh yeah.. yeah... it's nice to finally meet you!"

Yeah. Easy to meet when you're sitting outside waiting for me to come home.

Not to mention the fact that he was just in my backyard with my dog, retying her up. I appreciate it, because she was uncomfortable, and I love that people are watching out for her... but jeez...

I was planning on an in-and-out, quick introduction... but then his wife came out, and they talked about how great Heather was (the girl who owned the house before me) and how she loved their flowers and how she had a great dog and how heather did this and heather did that...

"Yeah, well it was great to meet you... I actually--"

"Yeah... Heather used to stare out her window while washing dishes and admire my flower bed."

"Oh... yeah... that's... great!"

How do people miss the bow-out sentence in conversations? I"m a master of this. Everyone always gets it. I even turn to walk away from the conversation...

But these guys just...kept...talking.

After about 40 minutes (i'm not even exagerating) I finally got out of my driveway.





Which is why, I'm saying... Whoever is in charge of my karma and special powers... sign me up for Samantha Steven's nose twitching abilities.

I have:

*:: A Cute Nose
*:: The Name Samantha (I'll find a man with the last name Stevens, if need be).
*:: A Cat
*:: The willing drive to succeed as a Mortal
*:: Not one, but TWO Gladys Kravitz Neighbors
*:: A very expansively bizarre family.

Come on. Help a sista' out!