It's a Different World

Here, I have One World, because my friends are my family, my family is everywhere, and my job is partially revolved around family. It's a giant connective circle.

Compare that to Denver, and the circumstances are much different, Because -

In Denver, I had Three Worlds:

1. My Job
2. My Friends
3. My Boyfriend.

They all started out as one, then split apart last fall due to certain situations that pretty much everyone . Friends are always good, I was too far into the relationship to give it up, and my job... well... my boss like a big brother that I'd never want to disapoint. I dealt with them how I wanted, and now I am where I am because of this.

Mind you... (World 3) the boy's birthday falls on a Sunday this year... Just one day after he plays a show:

(World 1)*:at the venue I used to work
(World 2)*:on the same bill with a few of my friends...

On June 24th, all three worlds collide again, which hasn't happened since hmm... never, and I am faced with the uncomfortable dilema of being pretty much obligated to be at said event because it rolls right into... that's right --- Seanzie's birthday.

Crap.

You see... in Denver I was able to avoid these catastrophe's all together...

But now, when it's an event for me to drive down for a weekend, it is not so. Call this 'shady' or whatever you will, but i was in the middle of a tug of war so long (because I want to be accomodating to everyone rather than do what i want for myself) that I'm used to that spot, and used to scheduling/co-operating with this lifestyle norm...

So... rather than be all, "Who cares what the f' you think about me!!?!" I care a lot, because people's opinions and feelings toward me are very important. Call that insecure, but... that's just who I am...

Add this on top of the fact that I haven't gotten an ounce of sleep for the last 3 days for god knows why, and I'm pretty sure I'll be up even longer worrying about this pre-determined debacle one month for next wednesday. Because how am I supposed to be there, and still have everyone happy with me?

Not...going....to happen *sigh* :0-(

This weighs heavy on my heart...

*I'm completely aware that if they all don't mesh, it probably shouldn't be done... but, sorry! i don't work that way. ask anyone.