Grrr...

I think i've hit an all-time low for the month, which is pretty good, considering it's only December 4th.

I'm feeling all 'woe-is-me' because men suck royally and never cease to amaze me with their jackass motives. I have to wonder if it's all my fault for just attracting all the wrong men. Maybe i should stop being so genuine/real and start pulling 19-year-old sorority girl bullshit. That'll get me a good man! Like, totally...for sure.

My suprisingly-accurate and relationship savvy friend out in LI says I always attract the alpha males. Well screw all of you... go pee on somebody else!

I had a heinous run-in last night with the stupid italian asshole that felt the need to tell me everything he could offer, but then, ended up not following through on a single fucking thing.

"So... since you want to be with me... you'll have to follow through with every word you say. All I really want is you to stick around...I'll see you every day, but you have to follow through."

Sorry. Gavin's stripped version of that song just came on Itunes. I <3 him.

Anywho...That guy is prime Alfie material. He walks in last night looking like he owns the place, with his new barbie-doll "girlfriend" (Whom i became friends with and is actually a huge sweetheart) and then proceeds to sit RIGHT in front of my friend and I while we're trying to watch a show. Instead of catching Rodney and his sweet guitar skills, we caught an up-close-and-personal "Oh! We have to prove to EVERYONE in the bar (Especially Sami) how in love we are!" Fucking gag me.

I"m glad they're so happy and enjoy each other's company. He's definately not right for me, so i don't condemn him from being with anyone else. Though, it did feel like he did that specifically to make me notice him.

"As opposed to the planet, 'Look at me, Look at me!"


I did, however, walk right up to him while he was whispering sweet loads-of-crap to the gorgeous girl next to him to politely ask him to move because our viewing of the show was severely skewed.

Afterward, he invited me over to his house for a keg party. (hey...a keg. i'm 18 all over again!) I said no. Talked a bit... we had some stare downs... a few tense arguements... His lady-love gave me a big hug goodbye, and his other friend from work shook my hand and said he was pleased to meet me. The boy however, shot straight for the door and ignored me. When i called him on it, he asked for a huge goodbye hug.

"No...thanks. I"m good."

This is where things went a tad awry, as I (whispered) some mean things... something about.. "you're an asshole, you're a dick, we need to talk." (Yes... i know. who would want to willingly talk to you after you insult them, but jeeezus... it was so warrented.)

His girl told us to talk because she could tell we had issues so she ran inside to fetch a friend.

"So... I told you not to waste your time if you were going to pull stupid shit like this and you did it anyway. What is your problem? I thot you didn't treat women like this."

"This is how i treat women."

Girl walks out. I point to her and say, "Well... don't treat her like that because she's cool as hell."

The whole time, he didn't even have the respect to look at me. Instead, he looked at the floor, like the coward that he is, all-the-while walking slowly away from me to his car because he knew he had just been exposed for exactly who he is, and that... my friends, is a big, fat, gap-apparelled PHONEY.

The girl walked up to say goodbye again and the boy started walking back in my general direction. Hmm.. wierd!

Within good reason tho, because the girl looked me straight in the eye and said, "Is this guy really an asshole, cause a friend of his set me up with him."

Hahaha... 'this guy?'

I got stared down by the boy, and all i said was, "Just be careful." then turned around and walked to my car smiling.

I think i'm going to submit his name for the "Who's who among Absolute Fucking Assholes" 2005 Edition.

Now, i'm not going to see Rodney again tonight because i don't want to run the chance of running into him again. Gross.

Unfortunately, he has two of my movies, which he claims he will bring by tomorrow... somehow i doubt it. But the sooner that happens, the sooner i never have to see him again. I hate him. i hate him. i hate him. i hate him.



I just saw CLOSER... now i'm depressed. I need to vent to my good friend in AZ about all of this, but he won't fucking pick up his phone/answer my texts. Gah!

Less bitter twentysomething bitching tomorrow. sorry kids, but i've been fuming all day... i'm slowly coming to the realization that i may just be alone forever because i always seem to get suckered into giving the crap guys a shot, then get a bitter attitude when i feel screwed over...which is really all my fault. But the whole 'men suck' attitude doesn't really invite good relationship karma...